TBR

The pink eye is behind me after a week of dousing my eyes, yes, both of them, with antibiotic eye drops. Fortunately, Charlie’s pediatrician gave us several refills during our last bout of pink eye, stating that Charlie’s parents could use them, too, when we inevitably contracted the nastiness of conjunctivitis. There was no “if” involved in that conversation. Dr. Y. knew it was just a matter of time. You see, that is why I love our pediatrician. He cares about the sanity of the whole family and not just the kid.

And now, with the stress of icky gooey red eyes behind me (and the embarrassment and need for explanation for why I look like I have been crying all night), I have a new stress in my life. And, as usual, this stress involves work.

As I have stated before, I work at a college as an administrative assistant. Actually, I am an administrative assistant II, which in essence means I am more than a secretary. In addition to typical office duties, I help to coordinate grant programs. Our newest adventure is a grant the college received this summer for The Big Read. This is a really exciting program (you can read more about it here and here), but it is so totally far removed from what I typically like to do. Why, you might ask? Because I find event planning of all sorts to be extremely difficult and ridden with anxiety. I am just not the kind of person who thinks about the behind the scenes details of special events, like making sure a panelist has a bottle of water, or making sure an esteemed speaker has a parking spot reserved, or making sure I have ordered enough cloths AND skirts for the tables. Ick! It is just is not fun for me. In fact, when planning my own wedding, I took an “I don’t really care” kind of approach mostly because I did not want to have to worry about the details that could possibly go wrong. The fewer details (like an ice sculpture, or the perfect flowers, or the release of butterflies at “I do” – all that extra stuff), the less I had to worry. And, my wedding was perfect because all I cared about was getting married and having a fun night for our guests.

So, The Big Read is forcing me to step outside of my comfort zone, and at times, I’m okay with it and at others, I just want to run away and hide out in a cabin in Wyoming somewhere. It is a lot of hard work and oftentimes, I feel like I am dangling off the side of a mountain on my own, guessing what I should do next. The Professor says that he is sure something good will come from all of this hard work. Surely, it won’t be some kind of lateral promotion for a job in event planning. That would really put me over the edge.

Photos that do not display any battle scars

It's been a while since I posted any pictures. Here is what Charlie looks like now. He has recently begun to attempt to stand up on his own and will soon be brave and confident enough to take his first steps. Look out world! But...he also has the battle scars to prove his new found skill - a bruise on the forehead, a small cut under his chin, and a puncture wound (a small cut from his tooth, actually) on his tongue. I don't have any pictures of them, so the ones below will have to suffice.

Tickled Pink

Lately, Charlie has been suffering from the pain that accompanies monstrous molars forcing their way through his gums. And let me tell you, it’s been fun! Not only does my poor baby cry in pain and agony, he also has difficulty sleeping because of these beasty teeth. For the past few weeks, he has cried in his sleep because of the pain, and frequently, he wakes up completely, forcing the Professor or me to pick him up and cuddle him. Usually, a little dab of Orajel or a few teething tablets do the trick and he is back to sleep in minutes. But on a few recent nights, he has been almost inconsolable, forcing us to put him in the bed with us in hopes of getting a little sleep. When we do this, he usually falls asleep fairly quickly, but the night ahead for us is miserable.

Last night, it happened. He woke around 11:00 p.m. It started with a little whining and grew to full on screams. I picked him up, cuddled him, rocked to him, and sang to him. Fifteen minutes later, he fell asleep. I slowly and carefully put him back in his crib, but the moment his head hit the mattress, he was awake again and crying. Next, I tried to put him in the bed with me. He seemed to be comfortable for a moment, but then started screaming. Again. It is now almost midnight.

Finally, the Professor woke, scooped Charlie up and sat with him in the den. Within 10 minutes, he was asleep (Daddy’s cuddles must be better). He brought him back to bed with us where he slept soundly for most of the night. Occasionally, he woke with a start, but when he woke up this morning, he sat up and smiled a big toothy grin at the Professor and me.

The Professor and I, on the other hand, had a night of fitful sleep with little Charlie feet in our faces and ribs, a few whacks in the face with his chubby little hands, and a couple of times, I woke to find that I was mere centimeters away from being shoved out of the bed. I am hoping that tonight will be much more peaceful. Please! Let tonight be full of sleep at our house.

To add to the discomfort of a sleepless evening, at 5:00 a.m. I woke to turn over (I woke up because I am deathly afraid of flopping on top of Charlie and smothering him). When I tried to open my eyes, I couldn’t get them to open. They were glued shut. “Were you just that tired” you may ask? Nope. I wish. They were glued shut because I somehow got pink eye in both eyes. Charlie had a mild case of it a week ago, and I guess with all of the nose wiping and smooching on my baby, I contracted that lovely infection. Ick! So if you see me out this week and feel the need to ask me what’s wrong because I look like I’ve been crying for three days straight, don’t worry. It’s just pinkeye.

Back to School Part II

I started school last Monday. I am taking two graduate classes – one is on-line and one meets one evening a week. So far, so good.

I really enjoy the classes and I feel great about getting back into the educator mindset, especially in the realm of teaching foreign language. Sometimes when reading or working on an assignment, I wonder why I never took this route before. It just seems like the perfect fit for me. My only concern is getting all of the work done. These classes are demanding, and I am finding it difficult to find time to focus on them for any long stretch of time. With work, Charlie, dogs, and life, it will be a struggle. But, it’s a struggle I am willing to work with because I know (hope) that in the end, it will be worth it.

Thanks to Gammie and Nana for helping take care of Charlie on the weekends so the Professor and I can study!

More Words

Tiger

Moo (every time he sees a picture of a cow or something that looks remotely like a cow) Another funny Charlie-ism lately is his ability to pant like a dog. I am proud to say that I taught him this one. We have a little dog book (thanks Aunt Tiffany!) and on the very first page is a dog named Missy. Missy is an English Bulldog with a huge wide open mouth and is panting. Her smile is contagious, making Charlie smile and yes, pant. It's the cutest thing I think he's done so far in his life. Well, the cutest next to giving Mommy hugs and kisses.

Some of the words thus far…

Daddy

Mama (finally!)

Uh-oh (He tried to say this word during his very first attempts at speech)

Maggie (pronounced Aggie - this was is first official word and "Daddy" was second)

Roxy (pronounced Oghy with a short "0" like ox)

Doggie

Car (this is usually the word for anything with wheels: a car, a truck, a wagon, etc.)

Cookie (pronounced co-ka with a long “o”)

Cracker (pronounced ka-ka)

Truck (on occasion)

Mmmmm (when eating something yummy of course!)

Ball

Cat

Sock

Cup

Belly (pronounced beh and stated only in combination with patting himself on the belly)

Ahh? (as a question as if to ask, “what is that?” or “can I have that?”)

Ahhhhhh…(in combination with a smiles and a razz sound with his tongue on his teeth – this is usually a sound of mild laughter or being pleased with himself)

AHHHHH!!! (screamed in a moment of slight rage when wanting something that is out of reach)

Back to School

It’s back to school time in Memphis. The Professor heads back to work this week. Charlie went back to school on last week. And me, too…I’m headed back to school as well.

Over the past months I have been struggling with Project What Do I Want To Be When I Grow Up. I have considered many things from careers in healthcare for humans to healthcare for animals to more grant-writing/grant management possibilities, and I have even toyed with the idea of going to back to what I was trained to do – teach high school English. I have spent hours upon hours researching different career possibilities, determining what kind of education I might need for the different options. I have considered quitting my job to go back to school and go back to the life of living on student loans, digging my family into an even deeper financial debt. If I had a real passion to drive me back to that lifestyle, I would probably do it. But, since I do not have an intense passion toward any of these choices, another bout at long-term full-time school is not a viable option. It just isn’t worth the risk to me. And since I already live in extreme panic about the debt my finally already lives with, I really cannot fathom what acquiring more debt would do to my psyche.

Several months ago, while agonizing over my career (or lack thereof), I made the leap to apply with the Memphis City and Shelby County school systems. At the time, I truly felt like teaching was the choice for me, as long as I was in an okay school. See, the school systems in Memphis, particularly the Memphis City School (MCS) system, are not the most respected or supported school systems in the country. MCS’s system is struggling. Many of its schools are in urban environments with high poverty levels and the problems that come from high poverty levels. These tend to equal to difficult experiences for teachers. It is not an ideal situation to want to be a teacher in the city of Memphis. And since I moved back to this city (my hometown) five years ago, I have been hesitant about even applying for a job in our schools.

Since I applied for a teaching position last spring, I have gone back and forth and ‘round and ‘round about this whole teaching thing. I know that I want my career to be meaningful. I know that I want to be involved in the community and do something for the greater whole. I love English: reading, writing, studying language, etc. I even attempt to be a grammar snob. I remember diagramming sentences in elementary school and loving it. But (here’s the big BUT), I don’t know if I can handle or even want to deal with the stress of being a teacher because let me tell you, it’s a hard job.

A couple of weeks ago, a thought crossed my mind that I had visited about a year ago. ESL. English as a Second Language. I remembered talking to a neighbor who is an ESL teacher in the Memphis City Schools. At the time, he said that ESL is the best kept secret for teachers. He had nothing but positive things to say about it and he intrigued me enough to seek out more information. I went to an ESL informational session and learned that there is a high need for ESL teachers in our city, and with my background in foreign language and with my current teaching license, I was a perfect candidate. I only had to take a handful of classes to get the certification, but at the time, I was not willing to even consider any more school. But now, well, now I think I may have figured it out! It seems to be just what I needed. I only have to take 5 courses to get the add-on certification, and I get to take them ALL on-line if I choose to do so. Wow!

So, for the moment, I am energized about this opportunity. I have registered for classes which begin next week. And hopefully, by this time next year, I’ll be in one of Memphis’ struggling schools helping kids who don’t speak English as their primary language. I am excited to see my future in this career. Just keep your fingers crossed that I don’t hesitate and change my mind by Christmas!